TOP STORIES
Big Tax Breaks for Businesses in Housing Bill
Homeless constituents huddling in capitol's doorways thank Congress for all their hard work
McCain Outlines Broad Proposals for U.S. Economy
Broads will be required to give up their jobs to support "family values".
Iraqi Unit Flees Post, Despite American’s Plea
Abu-Garib commander suggests return to use of dog-collars and leashes.
QUOTATION OF THE DAY
"There is nothing wrong with it — it’s not illegal. But it’s ugly."
WILLIAM H. GROSS, chief investment officer of Pacific Investment Management, on wearing garter belts, fish-nets and strap-ons while screwing their small investors.
OPINION
Right Fight, Wrong Word
In the Campaign Stops blog, Dan Schnur, a Republican political analyst, talks about why he needs to prove Barack Obama is an elitist. "Seriously, we'd rather run against Hillary if it's all the same to the Democrats."
WORLD
French Bill Takes Chic Out of Being Too Thin
Legislators complain skeletal mistresses insult pompous chefs, France's chief export.
Dozens Killed in Bombings in Four Iraqi Cities
American commanders suggest munitions manufacturing may be key to salvaging Iraqi economy. "The Iraqis should do what they're good at."
Protest by Zimbabwe’s Opposition Falters as the Army Makes a Show of Force
Opposition leaders initiate operation "Run & Hide", forget to tell followers.
U.S.
THE POPE'S VISIT
Pope, in U.S., Is ‘Ashamed’ of Pedophile Priests
Hopes ordering them to stand in a corner until mass is over will teach them a lesson.
‘The Lord Wants Us Here,’ Texas Pilgrims Say of Pope Visit
Pilgrims hope Pontiff will bestow on them The Lord's promise of Green Cards as well.
Bleak Stories Follow a Lawsuit on Oklahoma Foster Care
Children claim foster-care workers forced them to sing Rogers & Hammerstein tunes as extras in State-sponsored musical.
nytimes.com/theater
Morgan Freeman in "The Even-Tempered & Wise Best-Friend Guy"
Also in Theater:
• Harvey Fierstein in "It Really Hurts Me To Talk & Sing".
• David Hyde Pierce in "Another Effeminate Male Supporting Role".
• Laurence Fishburne in "Morpheus Rules!".
BUSINESS
Wall Street Winners Get Billion-Dollar Paydays
Wall Sreet Losers Get 401K Plans
Merck Wrote Drug Studies for Doctors
Company spokesman claimed Drug Giant was only trying to accommodate busy professionals.
Delta’s Chief Faces Skeptics as He Tries to Sell a Deal With Northwest
Airline employees want contractual promise that, get this, there won't be any layoffs after merger.
SPORTS
METS 6, NATIONALS 0
Mets win. 'Nuff said.
YANKEES 5, RAYS 3
Yankees getting their money's worth.
Putting Scandals in Past, Officials See Gains on Doping
Olympic Committee chief there's no reason to suspect anyone is doping anymore - the athletes, that is. Judges are another matter.
ARTS
On a New Album, Not Merely Acting Like a Singer
Zooey Deschanel can sing so you should buy her records as well as see her movies because one successful career just isn't enough for this ungrateful recipient of Hollywood nepotism.
VIDEO GAMES
Exploring Fantasy Life and Finding a $4 Billion Franchise
School-age girls find virtual retreat from sex & violence-soaked popular culture.
A Creator of Captain America, Fighting On
Superhero's strength and copyright lawyers needed to fight Hollywood villainy.
DINING & WINE
What’s for Dinner? The Pollster Wants to Know
Fast-food voters want instant gratification, not political nutrition.
One Cook, Thousands of Seders
What the hell are "seders"?
Too Much Heat in the TV Kitchen?
Gordon Ramsey needs his ass kicked.
EDITORIALS
Guns and Bitter
Bitter gun nuts hold primary hostage in Pennsylvania
The Limits of the Death Penalty
Supreme Court considers constitutionality of spitting and pissing on corpse.
Mr. Berlusconi’s Comeback
Italian prime minister promises beautiful women, fast cars and pasta on every table.
New Jersey’s Immigration Crackdown
State attorney general’s office changes official policy from "cracking spic heads" to "detaining persons of unknown immigration status with approved techniques while in public view".
OP-ED
OP-ED COLUMNIST
Eggheads and Cheese Balls
MAUREEN DOWD chimes in with the conservative choir's latest song and dance: Barack Obama is an out-of-touch elitist who we really, really, really, really don't want to run against in the general election. So vote for Hillary.
Topics in University Security: Lockdown 101
JAMES ALAN FOX thinks we should just chillax when it comes to college security. "It's really gonna ruin the campus buzz, yo."
Fear and Learning on Campus
ALICE MATHIAS thinks the ratings bonanza from school shootings will create more crimes of fame.
God and Man at Notre Dame
KENNETH L. WOODWARD hopes Pope Benedict XVI doesn't re-institute the use of thumb-screws in Catholic colleges and universities.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Friday, April 18, 2008
NYTime, Friday, April 18, 2008
TOP STORIES
Workers Get Fewer Hours, Deepening the Downturn
Promise overtime pay without more work will "stimulate" the economy
Benedict Meets With the Victims of Sexual Abuse
Wears Extra Long Robe And Promises Special Vatican Treats
Across Globe, Empty Bellies Bring Rising Anger
U.S. Farmers Suggest Filling Them With Ethanol
WORLD
Past Deals by N. Korea May Face Less Study
U.S. Says Looking Too Closely At The Past Hinders Present Plans
U.S. Begins Erecting Wall in Sadr City
Study finds more erections sorely needed in humorless community
A British Leader’s Day With President No. 43 and 44
Brits abandon names for interchangeable U.S. leaders
U.S.
Raising the Ante With Liquor Sales Bid
N'Orleans natives say hard-liquor key to recovering from "Federal Aid"
Inquiry Stays as HUD Chief Is Set to Leave
Bush admits he should never have trusted someone named "Alphonso"
Busy Day at Court Handling Sect’s Children
Court decides 416 polygamist children should be sent to 208 monogamous foster homes.
BUSINESS
Google Defies the Economy and Reports a Profit Surge
Proves "virtual" dollars beat real dollars any day
Iceland, a Tiny Dynamo, Loses Steam
Volcanic growth cooled by oceanic isolation and Bjork fatigue.
Sticker Shock in the Organic Aisles
As predicted, Americans prefer to eat cheap crap.
ARTS
Record Stores Fight to Be Long-Playing
New marketing scheme claims listening to vinyl can increase sexual-longevity.
MOVIES
MOVIE REVIEW | 'FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL'
There’s Just No Getting Away From an Old Flame, Even in Hawaii
Another hilarious adventure featuring that fat little Jewish guy and some other Jewish guys doing, I dunno, funny Jewish stuff.
MOVIE REVIEW | 'THE FORBIDDEN KINGDOM'
One More Time, Everybody Is Kung Fu Fighting
Jet Li vs Jackie Chan? I am SO there! Yo, tell everybody on the lacrosse team!
EDITORIALS
Whose Privilege?
Has congress finally grown some balls? Is Cheney finally too old to shoot straight? Stay tuned...
Still Waiting in Zimbabwe
...for the world to give a shit, or for Mugabe to kick it - whichever comes first.
Construction and Hard Times
You can't build it if they don't come.
OP-ED
Clinging to a Stereotype
Another spin-doctor tries to convince you working class Americans aren't bitter, bigoted or self-righteous when times get tough. Obama told it like it is, Yo.
OP-ED COLUMNIST
And another....That's right, this is a Hilary newspaper. Now I get it.
Our Neighbor, the Pope
How to warm-up to a Ratzenburger-meister-burger.
Workers Get Fewer Hours, Deepening the Downturn
Promise overtime pay without more work will "stimulate" the economy
Benedict Meets With the Victims of Sexual Abuse
Wears Extra Long Robe And Promises Special Vatican Treats
Across Globe, Empty Bellies Bring Rising Anger
U.S. Farmers Suggest Filling Them With Ethanol
WORLD
Past Deals by N. Korea May Face Less Study
U.S. Says Looking Too Closely At The Past Hinders Present Plans
U.S. Begins Erecting Wall in Sadr City
Study finds more erections sorely needed in humorless community
A British Leader’s Day With President No. 43 and 44
Brits abandon names for interchangeable U.S. leaders
U.S.
Raising the Ante With Liquor Sales Bid
N'Orleans natives say hard-liquor key to recovering from "Federal Aid"
Inquiry Stays as HUD Chief Is Set to Leave
Bush admits he should never have trusted someone named "Alphonso"
Busy Day at Court Handling Sect’s Children
Court decides 416 polygamist children should be sent to 208 monogamous foster homes.
BUSINESS
Google Defies the Economy and Reports a Profit Surge
Proves "virtual" dollars beat real dollars any day
Iceland, a Tiny Dynamo, Loses Steam
Volcanic growth cooled by oceanic isolation and Bjork fatigue.
Sticker Shock in the Organic Aisles
As predicted, Americans prefer to eat cheap crap.
ARTS
Record Stores Fight to Be Long-Playing
New marketing scheme claims listening to vinyl can increase sexual-longevity.
MOVIES
MOVIE REVIEW | 'FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL'
There’s Just No Getting Away From an Old Flame, Even in Hawaii
Another hilarious adventure featuring that fat little Jewish guy and some other Jewish guys doing, I dunno, funny Jewish stuff.
MOVIE REVIEW | 'THE FORBIDDEN KINGDOM'
One More Time, Everybody Is Kung Fu Fighting
Jet Li vs Jackie Chan? I am SO there! Yo, tell everybody on the lacrosse team!
EDITORIALS
Whose Privilege?
Has congress finally grown some balls? Is Cheney finally too old to shoot straight? Stay tuned...
Still Waiting in Zimbabwe
...for the world to give a shit, or for Mugabe to kick it - whichever comes first.
Construction and Hard Times
You can't build it if they don't come.
OP-ED
Clinging to a Stereotype
Another spin-doctor tries to convince you working class Americans aren't bitter, bigoted or self-righteous when times get tough. Obama told it like it is, Yo.
OP-ED COLUMNIST
And another....That's right, this is a Hilary newspaper. Now I get it.
Our Neighbor, the Pope
How to warm-up to a Ratzenburger-meister-burger.
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